I’ve always had a hard time picking out Mother’s Day cards. Like a really hard time. I haven’t ever felt like the few words or even few lines printed within could ever capture what I really want to say to my mom. As I’m a mother now, too, I find myself thinking about my childhood, the memories I have with my mom, how they’ve impacted my thirty years of life. Today, I’m thinking of school lunches and rhinestone filled dance competitions. What in the world do they have in common?
My mom made sure that we had the best homemade packed lunches as we went off to school - everyone wanted those bagel sandwiches. I remember countless times that friends wanted a “trade.” Your Dunkaroos for this magical bagel creation? Please. Each night, she packed them with what I think was a whole lot of love. Sandwiches. Check. Juice box. Check. A piece of fruit. Check. Napkins. Check. She did this well into high school. I remember my brother & I actually taking over one night, and then he ate half the sandwich he was supposed to pack...we couldn’t be trusted after that. Wink wink.
My mom was at every single dance competition and performance for me... (mom, correct me if I’m wrong). And, y’all, I danced from age three all the way to eighteen when I left to dance at college so that’s a heck of a lot. She encouraged my study of dance through her continued presence. She pulled my hair into the tightest bun, taught me how to do my make-up, let me give her the biggest lipstick smooch on her cheek before heading to the stage.
So, what do my mom’s packed lunches and never-ending dance competitions have in common? These seemingly small love-filled, often quiet moments built up to a whole lot. My mom continues to teach me that love isn’t found in the huge, grand gestures (although those are beautiful, too). The beauty is in the small. Now that we have our own little guy, I’m bewildered by how she navigated evenings with two kids - getting home from work, driving me to dance and the little brother to t-ball/football/lacrosse, making dinner, andmaking those lunches. I’m amazed that she made it to so. many. dance. competitions.
Her love was in her presence. Her love was in her hands as they put together our meals. And, that love gave me confidence. A belief that I matter. I’ve never thought that I wasn’t capable. I’ve rarely thought that I wasn’t worthy. Sure, I’ve been scared. I’ve been frustrated, but I trust in the impossible. Love can do so many things.
Fittingly, my mom bought Bodhi a book before he was born called What Do You Do With an Idea? The boy in the story nurtures and loves on his idea in seemingly small ways, but that eventually adds up to something great. Thank you, mom, for teaching me to do small things with great love. I just couldn’t fit this in a Hallmark card. I love you.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mamas out there, mamas to be, mamas who want to be. <3
P.S. I'm teaching a Prenatal Yoga Summer Series, starting Saturday, June 9. Prenatal Yoga weaves together yoga movement, breath, childbirth education & body awareness, along with a wonderful community of women. I'd love you to join!