You guys, would you believe Bodhi Bear is 15 months old? For a little over a month, I’ve been mostly on my own again with little man, much like those early, early days before we had child care. And, at times it’s really lonely. Like I’m the only human caring for a toddler in a new place. Loneliness is real for so many of us.
I’ve noticed how much I crave a community of like-minded women, parents, and friends. And as we branch out to the local libraries, music classes, and the park for regular visits, I’m reflecting on this craving for relationships, for friendship, for interesting and deep and delightful conversation not only as a mother, but as a business owner, yoga student, and Harry Potter loving human.
I had this craving when I first moved to Lewisburg. When I switched jobs and started working remotely. When Bodhi got to be about three months old, too. Major life transitions (and hell, just life in general) require real human connection. Don’t you think? Can I tell you a little story? Maybe two? About finding connection and the realization it brings?
When Bodhi was three months old, he developed acid reflux. He was up every hour (literally every hour) at night. He had to sleep nearly upright on my chest or Eugene’s arms in a football hold. I would walk for hours and hours with him in the Moby wrap so that he would rest during the day. They were truly the hardest moments of my life. Sleep deprived. Anxious. And, when Eugene started going back to work, I felt so alone. Honestly, I have no idea how I made it through teaching yoga classes at the studio…I was that tired.
I needed non-judgemental support and found it at the local library. Here, was a group of parents and young babies who didn’t care if there was mascara running down my face from crying all morning. Who didn’t judge about “co-sleeping” or not co-sleeping or whatever. Here was a teacher who cared about my baby’s development, who knew his name, and shared genuine enthusiasm about seeing us (no matter how we rolled in). That group and that teacher were a saving grace so. many. weeks. I don’t know if they knew how much they meant to me.
Fast forward to a few days before leaving for Rhode Island. I’m sitting with a friend drinking coffee and tea in the local coffee shop (if you’re in Lewisburg, you know the one, right?). And, we’re talking about our moves from big cities to this central PA town. We’re talking about having first babies, our work, past jobs, current jobs. How genuinely grateful we were to find each other. How much we needed each other to pull through some bleaker moments or just seriously mundane ones. You guys, this friend came to the studio with homemade blueberry banana bread, while she was very pregnant nearly the minute I called to say I’m having a really, really bad day. Dear friend, I still remember the pink coat you were wearing that February day. I don’t know if you can understand how much our friendship means to me. We left the coffee shop that day with some tears and hugs. And, I left realizing how much I meant to her, too.
Very often in this fast paced, online world, we feel more alone than ever (even when we are “supposed” to be more connected. We can feel incredibly insignificant, tiny specks in a world that moves so quickly physically and digitally. But, here’s the thing. Today’s the day to stop stealing from your wholeness, from your significance - asteya as it’s known in our yoga practice. You matter more than you can ever realize to someone, likely to many people. Just like those storytime parents and that library teacher, and my friend in the coffee shop mean to me.
How do I know this? Because I’m guessing there are people who matter to you, individuals you are so, so grateful to have in your life. These people delight you, see you, share your joys and your fears. Am I right? And, if that’s the case…then I’m betting you’re that someone to someone else, too. 100%. In honor of Thanksgiving, I’d love if you’d leave a comment here about those people in your life who need to know that they matter. Maybe forward this to her or him, too.
Happy Thanksgiving, yoga friends. I’m so delighted to be learning and growing on this yoga journey with you.
P.S. We’re sharing something kind of fun, kind of soon. ;) Please make sure these emails are hitting your “Primary” inbox so you can stay up to date on all the sweetness.